Posted by Bobbie | Posted in Relatives | Posted on Tue January 19, 2010
Let me just say I love my mom. But sometimes she drives me a bit crazy.
After all of the invites to join me at the gym (that have gone ignored) imagine my shock and dismay when she stopped by last night and asked me to pull up a website for her. The website is for a product called “Instant Arm Lift“.
Like me, she has battled her weight, up and down and all around. Gaining and losing.
Lately she’s been gaining more than she’s lost and I feel bad for her. I’ve been there so many times too. I’ve invited her numerous times to hit the gym with me. She turns me down cold every single time. Or she just changes the subject.
Another thing we have in common is flabby underarms. It’s this nasty family secret (okay NO ONE is hiding those bat wings why am I kidding myself?) that we don’t like to talk about. A lot of the women on her side of the family have this problem, so I’m sure genetics play a role.
Mom seen Kathie Lee Gifford trying out the product on one of the morning shows. And Mom really wants to “hide” those nasty, flabby crabby underarms. (Not get rid of them, mind you.)
Here’s my right arm. I don’t play the hide game – it is what it is. The pic sucks
because you wouldn’t believe the guns I’m developing, which you can see the
definition a bit at the top. The picture just doesn’t do it justice. I’ve lost
considerable inches from underneath. And I’m loving my arms. Can you
imagine how much flab I had back in November?
So I pulled up the website. The product is laughable at best. A great idea, I must say, for those that want that “magic pill” or easy fix. But folks, NEWS FLASH – there is NO EASY FREAKING FIX.
Checkout the FAQ’s of Instant Arm Lift.
I was laughing my ass off reading these. Basically, it’s tape. You’re taping your underarm fat. You’re not getting rid of it. Be sure to shave your pits first, because it’s going to lay a hurt on you when you take that tape off, girl. And don’t wear any deodorant, as they don’t recommend it.
CONCLUSION: If you use this product, your arms may look less flabby, but they’ll still be flabby. It’s going to hurt like hell when you rip the tape off. And you will reek of B.O. because they don’t recommend deodorant.
And can you imagine being at a wedding wearing a sleeveless dress and the horror of someone coming up and saying, “Dude. You have clear tape stuck to your arm. Just thought you’d like to know.”
Kind of negates the whole thing doesn’t it? I’d rather smell good with my flabby ass arms then smell like a skank, you know?
Tue January 19, 2010 at 11:57 AM
You are such a good example to your mom.
Those gimmicks are so sad…cuz people fall for it.
Don’t pagent women tape their breasts to lift them or something? That must hurt coming off. Why do we women in one way or another hurt ourselves (I’m not talking about the work-out pain) for the sake of beauty?
CAPTCHA Code is: DYE B
Gina Fit by 41 Maybe 42´s last blog ..Happy 101 Award
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 19th, 2010 at 6:37 pm
Too much work for me!!! I would hate to go through those extremes.
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 1:07 PM
Good point about the clear tape. I was thinking of doing an instant arm lift on the cheap, but I had planned to use duct tape. Clear might be less noticeable. :):)
Mothers. You gotta love ‘em.
Cammy@TippyToeDiet´s last blog ..Practice, Practice, Practice
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 19th, 2010 at 6:38 pm
Ha ha you crack me up!!! ;)
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 1:37 PM
LOL!
Can they invent the easy butt lift and stomach-away? Can you just imagine people who buy this stuff and have to tape themselves up every morning? Sheesh. What will they think of next?
You are right. Hard work is what it takes to make the flabby arms go bye bye.
Great post! :)
~Kellie
The Chubby Girl Diaries´s last blog ..I can do it and so can YOU!
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 1:55 PM
Do you think they have an Instant Body Lift??? I could use one of those! :)
rubbish.
Tiffany´s last blog ..Day #19: To Count or Not to Count…That is My Question!
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 2:07 PM
LOL! I’m waiting for the Instant Ass Lift!
karen@fitnessjourney´s last blog ..Improving Your Blog: A Few Tips
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 19th, 2010 at 6:38 pm
Me too!!! But it’ll never come… Sadly….
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 3:06 PM
Although this is a silly idea – I do wish there was something that would take care of the extra skin without maiming people for life! I had a family member who had surgery for her arm flaps and was left with a horrendous, horrendous scar.
By the way – CONGRATS on the weight yesterday!!
Diane Fit to the Finish´s last blog ..I was (sorta) Miss Sea World
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 19th, 2010 at 6:39 pm
Thanks Diane! And that’s sad about the scars. :(
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 6:10 PM
I saw this on Hoda & KLG! Craziness & Kathie Lee screamed bloody crazy trying to pull it off! Ya got to do the work & quick fixes ain’t gonna help after ya take the stuff off. AND, you can see so kind of weird going out in that! :-O
Jody – Fit at 52´s last blog ..Book Review – Female Brain Gone Insane; GIVEAWAY!
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Tue January 19, 2010 at 6:52 PM
“transparent lifting strips” heehee!
can you imagine, in addition to what you said about the people who come up and say you have tape on your arm, but also the people who just go ahead and pick a piece of lint off your shirt… so they would grab the tape and oh the result has me giggling!
liz´s last blog ..My First Award!
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 19th, 2010 at 7:37 pm
Oh… the pain. I can only imagine!!! hee hee
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Wed January 20, 2010 at 6:58 AM
There are just no words. And you know me, so you realize that’s a rare thing indeed. What’s even funnier is that there’s clearly a market for it. Kinda like the bras with clear straps: who are you fooling there? Just wear a matching bra with your tank top and be done with it! Sheesh! ;-)
Hot Mother´s last blog ..Suck it, Precor!
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 8:00 am
I always thought the bras with clear straps look super skanky. LOL
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Thu January 21, 2010 at 7:01 PM
Wow, you have got some serious guns going on!! I bet you could kick my butt in armwrestling, lol!
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 21st, 2010 at 8:21 pm
ha ha I don’t know about THAT! :)
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Fri January 22, 2010 at 10:17 AM
Already tried the duct tape….ripped my skin off and caused blisters! Sounds like I’m the only one who has tried these. I know they seem funny, but they really work. Kathie Lee is an idiot! You don’t RIP them off like a hair remover. The instructions say to remove them very slowly, and I can attest that they DO NOT HURT. You can not see them when you wear a shot sleeve shirt…so don’t laugh too soon. You may be buying them next!
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 22nd, 2010 at 10:35 am
No, not my bag Gina. But I’m glad they worked for you! :)
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Fri January 22, 2010 at 11:58 AM
(Different Gina)
Gina Fit by 41 Maybe 42´s last blog ..Expensive Chocolate
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Anonymous Fat Girl Reply:
January 22nd, 2010 at 12:12 pm
ha ha! Yea I kind of figured that out. The other Gina didn’t leave a blog address. :(
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Thu January 28, 2010 at 8:07 PM
[...] We covered this topic back a few weeks ago. Basically, if you buy this product you will reek of B.O. and you will still have fat underarms. So [...]